Chapter 74.3
“She will come back.” Jiang Xu told Lin An Lan.
“She won’t come back.” Lin An Lan said coldly.
“She will.”
“She won’t!” Lin An Lan said angrily, “If she would have come back, she wouldn’t have left you behind. Doesn’t she know it would be hard for you if she leaves? Of course she knows, but she doesn’t care. She doesn’t care about you Jiang Xu, she doesn’t want you anymore, so don’t wait for her, what are you waiting for her for? You can’t wait!”
“She will!” Jiang Xu shouted, “You don’t understand anything, you have a family, you have a father and a mother, how can you understand my pain, I only have her, how can she abandon me!”
Lin An Lan was silent, he looked at Jiang Xu and felt like he was looking at his former self.
But he had already forgotten his real mother, he couldn’t even remember what she looked like. The only mother he remembered was Mother Lin.
How lucky he was that his adoptive parents, in order to protect him and to avoid gossip, said that he’d had a son a few years ago in his old age but had left him at home with his old man, but now that he had passed away, they had brought the child back.
When people saw how similar he and Lin Bo looked, they only half-believed the story. If it hadn’t been for the memory of Mother Lin’s pregnancy, they would have believed everything.
So no one knew that he was adopted, but some people guessed that he was the child of one of Father Lin’s siblings who had passed him on to his father, but no one ever knew that he was adopted.
Lin An Lan didn’t want to destroy his parents’ good intentions, so he just said to Jiang Xu, “She has already done it, it’s not worth it for you to feel sad because of her.”
However, Jiang Xu not only felt sad because of her, but also began to degenerate because of her.
He sent a message to Jiang Liying, saying that he was now not attending classes and was at an Internet cafe, saying that he didn’t want to study and didn’t plan to take the college entrance exam.
He immersed himself in the Internet world and started to smoke and drink with hooligans.
He wanted Jiang Liying to show up, he wanted her to scold him and then discover that she couldn’t let him go.
But Jiang Liying didn’t show up.
Only Lin An Lan appeared.
Lin An Lan scolded him at the Internet cafe, Lin An Lan picked him up from the bar, and Lin An Lan turned around and left in disappointment and anger.
As Jiang Xu was afraid of him, he would go after him then listen to Lin An Lan scold him, but wouldn’t dare say anything back.
It was always like this between them. Whenever Lin An Lan wasn’t paying attention, Jiang Xu would jump about like crazy, but Lin An Lan didn’t care, however Jiang Xu wouldn’t step on his bottom line.
But once Lin An Lan became angry, Jiang Xu would become afraid and could only admit his mistakes and beg Lin An Lan for forgiveness.
One day Lin An Lan asked him, “Will you still continue to degenerate?”
Jiang Xu shook his head.
“Will you listen?”
Jiang Xu nodded his head.
“Still want to wait for her?”
Jiang Xu didn’t say anything.
Lin An Lan turned his head to leave but Jiang Xu tugged his shirt, the look in his eyes pitiful.
At that moment, Lin An Lan felt that he was actually much more heartless than Jiang Xu.
He was only five years old, but he could give up his mother in his heart, but Jiang Xu, who was seventeen years old, was still holding on to the faintest of impossible hopes.
He sighed and said helplessly, “If you want to wait, wait in your heart, wait secretly, don’t let me know, don’t tell me, otherwise, I will scold you for being unpromising.”
Jiang Xu looked at him and lowered his eyes silently, nodding his head in what seemed like a compromise.
That night, Jiang Xu drank wine, he leaned against Lin An Lan and said, “Xiao Lan, I don’t have a mother.”
“I didn’t have a father, but now, I don’t even have a mother.”
Lin An Lan was silent for a moment, his mind was filled with his young self. He had been born without knowing who his father was, and his memory never seemed to have his father’s figure.
He only had a mother, but his mother had abandoned him.
He looked at Jiang Xu, who was leaning against him with his eyes closed, and under the dim light, he looked like an enlarged version of his former self.
Lin An Lan looked at his former self gently.
He said, as if to Jiang Xu, as well as to his former self, “It’s okay, you still have me, I will be with you.”
Jiang Xu nodded and he said, “Xiao Lan, you’re so nice.”
“So, don’t wait for her anymore.”
“Okay.” Jiang Xu responded.
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Damn now I feel sad abt Jiang Xu and Li An An’s friendship. JX should’ve treated LAA better. I get that LAA staying away from the ml is non negotiable but did he have to use LAA to get back at his father (by asking LAA to seduce the ml and bring him to his house)? Now he’s living with the consequence.
I mean- I have sympathy and a little bit of pity towards Jiang Xu now… But still. Living through certain things doesn’t give you the right to act certain ways. It can help people understand your actions, but it does not excuse them. He has an unhealthy relationship with Lin An Lan. Really, not even my own mother has ever tried to control me the way he tried to govern over the life of Lin An Lan.
I can understand he was traumatized, he probably hasn’t gotten over anything because he didn’t learn the proper ways to deal with his trauma. But still having such deep hatred towards Cheng Yu is genuinely baffling to me. One thing is to be a kid and not know anything, the other is to be almost 30 and still blame the son of your father (let’s not forget, your father CHEATED on his wife with your mother. You’re literally 2 or 3 months younger than his first son.) It’s a fucking miracle he isn’t blaming your mother nor hating you. Feelings are okay, because we can’t control them. But let’s not be idiots; Cheng Yu is the one who would rightfully have ANY hatred justified. He acts like a kid again and again and again, as if he never grew up after what happened in his 17’s. Literally throwing temper tantrums to his half-brother and to Lin An Lan. Because LAL always coaxed him and because CY never gave him any type of consequence for his actions, he acts like everyone ows him, and he’s a perpetual victim. I can’t stand him. Rant over, sorry.