But now, Lin An Lan didn’t know what he was feeling.
Taking out his cell phone, he took the rare initiative to call Jiang Xu.
Jiang Xu picked up in surprise, asking him, “Xiao Lan, you want to see me?”
“You said before, that Cheng Yu was lying to me, that he’s not my boyfriend.”
“Yes.” Jiang Xu said hurriedly, “Of course he’s not your boyfriend, how could he be your boyfriend? You don’t even like him!”
“Do you have any proof?” Lin An Lan asked.
“You two were originally not in a relationship, so how can I have proof that you’re not in a relationship when you weren’t even in a relationship. Xiao Lan, believe me okay? Here, I’ll show you our previous WeChat records, there’s the occasional mention of Cheng Yu, but you’ll know when you see it. You really have no feelings for him, he’s really not your boyfriend.”
“Alright, when I need to, I’ll come to you.”
“Xiao Lan, have you finally discovered that he’s a liar?” Jiang Xu asked excitedly.
Lin An Lan didn’t say anything, hanging up the call.
Sitting on the bed in silence, he waited for Cheng Yu to return.
He still wanted to make one last struggle, still wanted to hear what Cheng Yu had to say.
He wanted Cheng Yu to tell him that he hadn’t lied to him, that they really were lovers, that he really was his boyfriend.
He wanted Cheng Yu to produce proof, he wanted Cheng Yu to tell him that he had misunderstood the words on the picture.
Anything would be fine, he just shouldn’t lie to him.
He sat quietly, listening to the clock tick away.
As Cheng Yu sat in the living room of the Yu family house, he somehow felt uneasy.
He sent a message to Lin An Lan, asking him: [Have you found the book?]
Lin An Lan replied: [Yes.]
There was no problem, yet he was still panicking.
He didn’t understand where the panic was coming from, yet he was afraid that something had happened to Lin An Lan, so he wanted to go back early.
“Grandma, I have something to do, so I’ll be leaving first. I’ll see you next time.” Cheng Yu said in a warm tone.
Old Lady Yu couldn’t bear to let him go, “Why are you in such a hurry to leave? You haven’t even had a few bites of this dish yet.”
“I really have something to do. Next time, I’ll be sure to spend my birthday with you, Grandma.”
When Old Lady Yu heard this, she didn’t force him to stay. She just said, “Then remember what you’ve just said.”
Standing up, Cheng Yu walked out. As Yu Heng saw him off, he asked, “What’s wrong?”
“I don’t know, I just feel unsettled.”
“Don’t worry.” Yu Heng patted him on the shoulder, “Everything will be fine.”
“I hope so.”
Saying this, Cheng Yu got into his car and drove back.
It was already dark and the light of the night had cast a veil over the city, causing it to look very still.
Cheng Yu had never felt that the road was so long. It was clear that he was driving fast, yet he still couldn’t see his home.
It was clear that his home was there, yet he couldn’t go back.
He sped along, wanting to get back sooner, to see his beloved sooner, to settle his heart sooner.
Opening the door, Cheng Yu rushed into the bedroom anxiously.
When he saw Lin An Lan sitting beside the bed, as still as a painting, his heart instantly fell back into his stomach.
“You’re back.” Lin An Lan whispered, then glanced at his watch, “You’re earlier than I thought you would be.”
“I missed you, so I came back early.” Going closer to him, Cheng Yu, sat down beside him.
Lin An Lan looked at him, looked deeply at him.
He was so handsome. His eyebrows were almost as if someone had painted them specially, dotted them with the deepest of colors and then traced them with the gentlest of outlines.
He was so good to him. Whatever he wanted, he was willing to give it to him, and whatever he didn’t like, he wouldn’t touch.
Who could tell that he was a liar?
Who could have guessed, that he wasn’t his boyfriend?
“What’s wrong?” Seeing that he kept looking at him sadly, Cheng Yu asked with concern.
Lin An Lan asked as he looked at him, “Cheng Yu, can you answer a question for me?”
“Have you ever lied to me?” Lin An Lan asked him, “Even once, have you ever lied to me?”
Cheng Yu froze, not expecting Lin An Lan to ask this. He looked at Lin An Lan in a daze, and for a moment didn’t know how to answer.
“No.” He heard himself say after a moment of hesitation.
“How could I lie to you?” His words were soft and sincere, sounding so very believable that one couldn’t help but believe them.
Nodding, Lin An Lan asked, “Then can you tell me, why you wrote the words ‘I want him’ on the picture dated 26th August? Weren’t we already together at that time? So why did you still want me?”
Cheng Yu instantly felt like he had been struck by lightning, his whole body freezing in place.
He finally knew what the panic and unease he had been feeling was.
He finally knew why Lin An Lan had asked him if he had lied to him.
The pictures, how could he have forgotten about them!
They were all pictures from long ago, but not so long ago as well, after all there were also pictures from last year. He had loved Lin An Lan for so many years, but couldn’t love him and couldn’t walk beside him. He could only rely on those pictures for solace.
He had taken too many pictures that he had even arranged them chronologically in albums, until Lin An Lan knocked on his door.
He hadn’t expected Lin An Lan would think he was his boyfriend and never expected that he would actually dare say yes.
So he had put all those pictures away, putting them together in the bookcase in his study.
He had been afraid that Lin An Lan would see them, that he would be disgusted with his perverted behavior.
But he never expect that Lin An Lan would still see them anyway, and that he would even use those pictures to discover the flaws in his lie.
He had been careless, he had been too careless. He hadn’t expected Lin An Lan to go through the cupboard under the bookcase, and he hadn’t expected, that he would see the pictures.
Cheng Yu was momentarily speechless, not knowing how to defend himself.
He could tell him, of course, that those words meant something else, but then after that what, lie to him again, then keep on lying to him?
Even if he wanted to, would Lin An Lan still believe him?
When Lin An Lan didn’t doubt him, everything he said was believable.
But now that Lin An Lan had began to doubt him, there were simply too many flaws in his words and actions.
He didn’t even have a picture of them together from before.
Looking at him, Cheng Yu couldn’t say a word.
Lin An Lan had a thoroughly difficult time in this moment.
He looked at the person in front of him, his eyes sore and hot.
How he wished Cheng Yu would tell him that he had thought wrongly, that he was thinking too much, yet, Cheng Yu was telling him with his actions– that what he was thinking was true.
“Don’t you have any explanation?” Lin An Lan asked him, “Am I mistaken? Is it that I’m over thinking things and that it’s not what I think it means?”
Looking at the watery ripples in his eyes, Cheng Yu’s mouth was bitter as he said, “I’m sorry.”
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