Proofreader: Mika
Chapter 31.2
Cheng Yu walked over to his chair and sat down, picking up a glass of water and taking a sip, his eyes filled with gloom.
Sun Meng asked him, “What’s wrong? Did Lin An Lan drive you back?”
Cheng Yu shook his head.
“Then what is it?”
Cheng Yu put the water cup down without saying anything and picked up the script.
Sun Meng looked at him suspiciously, then looked towards Lin An Lan’s rest area, and finally couldn’t help but stand up and stretch his neck to look over there.
“Don’t look,” Cheng Yu said calmly, “he’s not here.”
“I knew you were back so early. Has he gone back to rest? Or did he go to have dinner?”
“He went to talk to Jiang Xu.”
Sun Meng: !!!
Sun Meng couldn’t believe it, “Who? Jiang Xu? Jiang Xu is here?”
“Hmm, to visit the set, said it was a surprise for him.”
“That’s quite a shock.”
Cheng Yu sniffed and laughed a little, “Quite a shock indeed.”
“And you still allowed him to go?” Sun Meng was puzzled, “Didn’t you not like Lin An Lan’s contact with Jiang Xu?”
“Does it matter what I like?” Cheng Yu asked him rhetorically, “I don’t like it, but haven’t they still been good friends for over ten years?”
“Then it’s not that it’s different now.”
Sun Meng looked at him and frowned, “Although I don’t support your immoral act of taking advantage of the situation, since you’re already in it now and Lin An Lan has started caring about you, shouldn’t you, at this time, reduce his contact with Jiang Xu and increase his closeness to you?”
“You know it’s unethical too.” Cheng Yu whispered, “It’s already immoral in itself, so how can I possibly, anymore, stop him from getting in touch with his friends?”
He put down the script in his hand, calm and despondent, “He will recover his memory one day. What I’m doing now is already enough to make him hate me, so I won’t dare to add to my mistake.”
Making a mistake was the kind of thing that many people did on impulse.
Cheng Yu felt that his mistake wasn’t exactly impulsive. Although it wasn’t well thought out either, if he had to do it all over again, he would still be despicable enough to say that he was Lin An Lan’s boyfriend on that day, knowing that it was wrong, knowing that it was immoral, but would do it again.
It wasn’t about clear headedness, sanity or scheming; it was just the most ordinary human nature couldn’t be tested.
It was impossible for him to resist this temptation, unless he didn’t love Lin An Lan.
But it was because of love that he would be more and more tied up after making a mistake.
It was only because he was afraid that he would hate him one day after he recovered his memory.
If he could, Cheng Yu would like to be like Jiang Xu, telling Lin An Lan openly to ignore him, not to talk to him, not to speak to him, not to have any dealings with him.
He hated Jiang Xu for being in between him and Lin An Lan and not allowing Lin An Lan to have any contact with him.
But if he were to have the position of being favoured by Lin An Lan like Jiang Xu, he would also want Lin An Lan to be like this, to have only him in his eyes, and to never have any contact with Jiang Xu again.
However, what qualifications did he have?
Jiang Xu was Lin An Lan’s recognised friend, the one who had been frank with him about his request to stay away from him when Lin An Lan knew everything clearly.
Lin An Lan had also agreed willingly.
There were no lies and no concealment between them, so Jiang Xu was justified.
Therefore even if Cheng Yu was jealous and bitter, he couldn’t do anything about it.
But what about him?
He was just a liar who took advantage of the situation when Lin An Lan lost his memory.
What qualifications did he have to ask Lin An Lan not to take care of and not to contact his real friends?
He wasn’t qualified.
And he also didn’t dare.
He had no way to live entirely only in the present. He enjoyed the dreamy, sugary, honeyed present, but was all the more worried about waking up from the dream, and whether the sweetness would be followed by a dagger or sweetness.
In the end, because he loved Lin An Lan, he dared not add to the mistake he had already made.
He could only suppress his panic, fear and possessiveness and allow Lin An Lan make his own choice.
If Lin An Lan wasn’t willing to get near Jiang Xu, then he would cut Jiang Xu off completely from having the chance to get into contact with Lin An Lan.
But if Lin An Lan was willing to go with Jiang Xu, he wouldn’t stop him, nor would he dare to.
Calling out to Lin An Lan when he saw that he was about to leave, was because he hoped that he would stay and not talk to Jiang Xu.
But he didn’t.
He chose to accept this conversation.
So he also chose to accept this conversation.
Cheng Yu blinked slowly. He kept on feeling as if there was something weighing down on his heart, weighing down so heavily that it made him gasp for breath.
He wanted a smoke.
But he quickly realised that he was still filming and it wasn’t appropriate.
So he stood up and took out a box of mint candies from the bag beside Wang Cheng.
It was cool and refreshing, just like a pot of cold water, enough to wake him up.
Pressing down his curiosity and uneasiness, he went through the script again.
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